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China Building Evacuation Update

Homeowners Wu Ping and her husband refused to move or sell their home in Chongqing, China, despite governmental pressures. The recent eyewitness report from SNTC showed the shark infested moat created to coerce the Ping family to abandon their property.

Local authorities have since drained the moat, and have adopted new tactics. Ms. Wu is now being fined the equivalent of $500 per day for neglecting her front yard and violating the local “beautiful, natural, always” landscaping ordinance.

Last House on the Block Owner

Ms. Wu responds that although she attempted three times to reseed her front lawn with a St. Augustine and Kentucky Bluegrass seed mix, it all washes away when she puts the sprinklers out. “And the weeds are out of control too,” she adds “because I can’t reach them!”

More pictures can be seen at The Telegraph. Found via Arbroath.

Not good with directions? Then buy a TomTom or a car with built-in satellite navigation. Directionally challenged, but driving a sporty $100,000 Mercedes SL500? Then follow the navigation system’s instructions precisely, regardless of how illogical they may seem.

Sounds like ridiculous advice, right? Not to the 20-something British driver:

Mercedes Poor Navigation

The young woman, identified only as Hayley, was recently on her way to a party in central England when the navigation system led her down an old farm road. She completely ignored signs stating that the road was impassable by non-farm vehicles, and continued until she reached a ford in Sheepy Magna.

Even though the usually shallow river was swollen from flooding, the driver accepted her navigation system’s instructions and attempted to cross. Almost half a mile downstream, the car finally ran aground and the woman was rescued by a local villager. Within minutes, the car became dislodged again, and completely filled with water.

Little additional information is available regarding the navigation-deficient driver, although we do know she was finally rescued from the village itself by a chauffer-driven Bentley. How tragic.

via

We now have an exclusive update on the chinese family who refused to leave their home, even after it looked like this:

China House
(if you haven’t seen the original story, you can read it here)

Turns out that the local Chinese government has decided to turn up the heat. Here is a photo that we just took at daybreak this morning:

China Island Home Evacuation

I also had the rare opportunity to interview a local Chinese government official on the developing story. Here are his responses:

Anita: Sir, this photograph makes it look like you are trying to bully the owners out of their home.
Official: Not at all, we are trying to help them.

Anita: Huh? That’s seems rather far fetched, can you clarify?
Official: Oh yes, sorry. Two nights ago, after the news slipped past our censors, err, I mean … after the world learned of this family’s honorable stand, a large dam malfunctioned and flooded the work site. The family almost drowned.

Anita: It ONLY damaged this work site? And that’s why you installed a 50 foot deep drainage pipe in their exit path?
Official: Yes, it was quite a unique accident. Due to family ties, the government would not allow us to move the family, so we installed the drainage pipe. Our non-government affiliated contractors chose the location, there were no ulterior motives.

Anita: Then how do you justify the shark?
Official: Again, for their protection. The unprecedented media attention drew large crowds of people who were swimming to the family’s island to offer assistance. We cannot allow such disruption, so we flew in a Great White shark to fend off the crowds.

Anita: Wouldn’t this put the family’s lives at danger too? Why not at least give them a sturdy boat, or build them a bridge?
Official: Those are excellent questions. I’ll ask my superiors once we finish installing the electrified steps down to the row boat.

Original pic via Spluch

Notice anything strange about Derek Jeter’s newest Topps baseball card?

Derek Jeter Baseball Card with George Bush and Mickey Mantle

Wait, is that George W. Bush waving to Mr. November as he takes a swing? Who knew that secret service would allow the president to sit in the regular box seats? And who’s that in the dugout? Did the Great Mickey Mantle decided to make a return to the living to catch a Yankees game? Talk about pressure!

Apparently somewhere between the final proofing and printing the cards, someone at the company thought it would be funny to put in Bush and Mantle. It was too late for Topps to change the card, so they just laughed and included the card in the set.

I’d love to get one of these, seems like it would make a great collector’s card one day.

Link

What’s the easiest way to guarantee that the DMV won’t renew your driver’s license, even if you show up on time with all your paper’s in order? Try this:

(if you can’t see the video, here)

Surprisingly, all injuries were later reported to be very minor. Think they renewed her license?

Florida (Strutts News Services) – Construction of the world’s largest miniature golf course began last week on the outskirts of Hacalugi, FL. Mr. Lannie Foosers, president of of Foosers Excavation, described the project as, “a virtual act of God. This is gonna be the greatest putt-putt golf course the world has ever seen, and we’re only on the first hole.”

World's Largest Putt-Putt Golf

However, construction has been temporarily halted. Hacalugi Councilwoman Tooncie Crumbler acknowledged the difficulties in getting approvals for the process. “It’s already a redevelopment district, so any improvement is, well, an improvement. After all, the first tee is a little over a quarter mile away. That’s a lot of land to manage.”

When asked about the schedule for the GMGC (Great Miniature Golf Course), Ms. Crumbler explained that the Hacalugi City Council was still working with the FAA to get approvals for a 422-foot tall windmill for the park. “Then, we’ll go on to the second hole,” explained Councilwoman Crumbler. “I hear that the par is going to be very challenging, but once you get to the green, no putters, no problem.”

The “Great Putt-Putt”, as it is known locally, is scheduled to officially open to the public sometime this century, maybe sooner. Or not.

Picture via Reuters

Now for another entry from the “you’ve got to be kidding me” news files. Over the past week, some areas of Mexico have received almost ten feet of snow! This is not a joke … here are pictures from a few suburban areas that were particularly hard hit by these freak snowstorms:

View from inside a home in Mexico:

Snow from inside home in Mexico

After a little shoveling:

Portrait in Mexico

Wow, nice neighborhood for Mexico!

Streets in Mexico

Mexico’s 2 horsepower snowplow warming up:

Horses plow through snow around Mexico

Pics via ABC, story via CNN ๐Ÿ˜‰

Our Crack team of photographers was able to capture this picture, a split second before Chewbacca headbutted a tour guide dressed as a pirate outside Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in L.A.:

Chewbacca attacks

‘Chewie’ was reported as saying รขโ‚ฌล“Nobody tells this Wookiee what to do,รขโ‚ฌย right before slamming his head into the guide’s forehead. While Superman was present, he didn’t step in to end the scuffle, probably because Elmo and Mr. Incredible had lost their priveleges in similar fights earlier (so far, all 100% real … via Reuters).

Chewie’s arrest marked the end of a long downward spiral from his famed role in Star Wars. Chewbacca’s first attempt at salvaging his career wasn’t so bad … his height and strength made him an unbeatable pitcher for the Boston Red Sox:
Chewbacca Pitches for Red Sox
(thanks Loren)

Chewbacca’s baseball career ended abruptly when he started eating baseballs and shooting at costumed stormtroopers with his laser. Given his celebrity status, the police felt that prison would be too dangerous for the wookie, so placed him in a zoo instead.

All was well until Chewie mistook a young kangaroo for a cute female Wookie:
Kangaroo after wookie attack
(picture by Dan via Little Lamb)

The police couldn’t excuse him for breaking the poor kangaroo’s leg (even if accidentally), so Chewbacca went underground:
Chewbacca in Disguise
(thanks Karin)

Celebrities … they can never stay out of the limelight for long, even if it means ditching a disguise to do a little headbutting. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Return of Snowzilla *UPDATED*

Today we had our first real snowfall in the Baltimore area, so my son and I decided to build a snowman:

Snowzilla

What do you think? Not bad for an afternoon, right? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Actually, as you may have seen in the news, this 22-24 foot tall monster snowman is the second coming of Snowzilla. This year, the Anchorage visionary behind Snowzilla made his creation a hulking 8 feet taller than last year (more info at msnbc).

For comparison, check out the (still giant) Winter 2005/2006 Snowzilla:

Snowzilla 2005 and 2006
(via Neatorama)

This year’s snowman is so big he had to use beer bottles for eyes, and a power drill to cut holes for the tree limb arms. You could almost make a fort inside the snowman he’s so massive (although after seeing The dog that stopped the war as a kid, I don’t think I’d ever step foot into a snow fort).

UPDATE: One of our readers, Nathan Drach, sent us a link to this in-progress 19 foot snowman in Madison, WI that was built in honor of Scott Bremser, a friend of his who recently died in a car accident:
Scott Bremser Snowman

Employees of Scott’s workplace built this snowman as a teambuilding activity as a fun memorial to Scott’s reputation as a team-builder:

It took eight people nearly six hours to build the snowman out of snow pulled from a ditch and water.

Employees used a Bobcat skid loader and snow fencing to pile the snow into the shape of a snowman. They piled on tires for a hat and added PVC pipes for arms, a construction cone for a nose and a king-sized sheet ripped into long strips and sewn together for a scarf.

You can read the entire story of this massive goodwill snowman on Nathan Drach’s Blog.

Thank you all!

On Friday, I learned that Say No to Crack is a finalist for Best New Blog in the 2007 Weblog of the Year Awards (“The Bloggies”). Voting is still open to select the #1 New Blog (directions below), but first I wanted to thank you all so much for your support and nominations so far!

This site has become something far more random, more fun, and more interesting than I initially conceived – all because of your feedback, comments, and submissions. I would give you an award or something, but since you’ve already been named Time’s person of the year, how can I beat that? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Hand from Toilet

Voting for the #1 new blog will continue until Friday, February 2nd. To vote, go to http://2007.bloggies.com/ (you don’t need to vote for every category, the Best New Blog category is near the bottom).

At any time, feel free to contact me via the tab at the top of the page, or e-mail: anitab83 -at- gmail -dot- com. I love posting your submissions, or expanding on ideas if you wish, and will always give you and your site credit.

Thanks again! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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