Car lovers of America watch out - soon you’ll have to share your roads with high performance Cart Bikes like this:

Most people contend that Americans don’t ride bikes because we’re fat, lazy, and have millions of miles of roads with no shoulder or bike paths. Sure, these might be minor considerations, but the truth is that we face a historical deficiency in bicycle styling. The Cart Bike is the obvious solution.

Now if you could just add a Port-A-Potty to the back that converted human waste to energy, you’d have the perfect eco-friendly bike. Want to make your own Cart Bike? Check out Instructables for the step-by-step.

Save the planet. Collect rainwater in a plastic facsimile of someone’s posterior, and then drink from it … this is what’s wrong with all the environmental crisis hype. It creates bizarre unnecessary industries such as this. I refuse to drink water from a butt, but if YOU want to, I won’t get in your way. Go for it. It’s cheaper than bottled water, “BUTT” it still tastes like…

They come in three race flavors, too: negro, caucasian, and badly sunburned european caucasian (the latter not pictured, “BUTT” may be found on the website). Y’all are completely on your own on this one.

Water Butts via Arbroath

These butts may also go well with the Water Butt Pump featured here a couple months ago.

…may very well cost Spirit Airlines very dearly.

Basically, a couple lost a lot of money when their flight with Spirit Airline was delayed, so they, disgruntled, wanted compensation for this, and for the poor customer service.

To achieve this, they wrote an e-mail to the CEO, and several other Spirit employees, explaining what they wanted. The CEO, apparently not knowing much about this crazy email stuff, or how to do things like, not be a total idiot, hits “reply to all” and sends the following message:

“Please respond, Pasquale, but we owe him nothing as far as I’m concerned. Let him tell the world how bad we are. He’s never flown us before anyway and will be back when we save him a penny.”

This reply was sent to his employees, and also to the customers.

“LET HIM TELL THE WORLD HOW BAD WE ARE.” …Done and done.

I don’t care whether or not the customers had a good argument or not, I don’t care whether the CEO was right and the airline owes them nothing…in this age of light-speed communication, a CEO cannot afford to be a callous jerk and e-mail impaired at the same time. Because when somebody says something like that, and allows it to become public…well…pretty soon the whole world does know how bad you are.

“he…will be back when we save him a penny.” No, Spirit. No, I don’t think he will be.

I don’t think I should find this funny at all. But somehow the combination of ridiculous idea, ridiculous…er…fake accents, and the name “Peterson-Patterson,” has inspired me to share this brief documentary into the minds of the creators of one of the greatest pieces of modern software in the world.

the future is NOW.

One of my online buddies must have known I needed a pick me up, because she basically told me to use an old DOS command shell and do this:

Geeky parents out there who grew up with DOS (like myself), might actually be sleep deprived and demented enough to think this was funny. I even did it twice and sang along.

To the vast majority of readers who are probably scratching their heads wondering why they just wasted 15 seconds reading this, all i can say is: syntax error, please insert disk in drive A:.

Want to try it yourself? I used the FreeDos Emulator - Thanks Gabrielle for the idea!

I’ve always thought Adobe Photoshop was easily the best desktop art software ever created, but after seeing the following video I’ve realized that I’ve been stifling my creativity and productivity. After the intro, prepare to be amazed with some of the demos:

(if you can’t see the video, click here)

Now, in all seriousness, a few people are EXTREMELY skilled with “The World’s Greatest Art Program”. For instance, the following painting was made with it in “only” 500 hours (by diamonster):

As was this video:

(if you can’t see the video, click here)

Impressive, but maybe I’ll just stick with Photoshop. This other program just looks too high tech and powerful for me.

I know I’m not the only person to look online to find out how many inches in a mile, how many grams in a pound…um…how many…er…units in a bigger unit.

Math is not my strength.

But now there is the Weird Converter, so you can know the important things, like, for instance…

1 male polar bear = 132 newborn babies.

1 Jenifer Aniston = 11111.11111111 sheets of paper.

1 Girraffe neck = 0.00002209595959596 Panama Canals.

Have fun! Beware though, some pg-13-themed units.

Liz Staley, the self-described “Queen of Corny 80’s Cartoons”, was looking for a way to express her beloved nerdiness. While simply pointing folks to her online craft profile stating that she is “a past life pirate” and present life “ninja” who currently is living “in a galaxy far, far away” would have probably been sufficient, she created this great geek necklace instead:

Liz crocheted the necklace by hand and then used recycled keys for the messages. She has created a few others as well, such as this one for geek girls:

Or my favorite, the pink “Byte M3″ necklace (non-geeks - read the 3 as an E):

If you’re interesting in buying your own handmade crocheted necklace, visit Liz Staley’s Realm of Nerdiness — a place “for all those who are nerdy and not afraid to show it!”

If a motorized toilet or mobile racing bathtub isn’t quite cool enough for you, then check out these motorized pink bunny slippers:

Greg Solberg (a Firmware Engineer at the incredibly cool Tesla Motors) and significant other Lisa decided to build these all-electric pink bunny slippers just to see if they could do it. While not exactly road worthy (they only go 15 mph), I imagine they would be great fun at a resort or beach.

Interested in building your own odd electric vehicle? Greg would probably love to help. He has a bit of a fascination with strange electrics. He’s build devices such as a “mobile electric floor lamp, end table, love seat, and Barcalounger”. Oh, and he just recently finished this all-electric cupcake:

Sweet!

Full story at Tesla Motors’ Blog via Gizmodo

Happy Birthday to me!
It’s my birthday (yippee!)
I like to eat cookies,
Happy birthday to me!

Yay! Yep, yep, yep, I’m so old. But I love birthdays, mostly. Time for cake (German chocolate), ice cream (vaaanilla), presents, and cards. I love cards. E-cards and real-life paper cards…it’s nice to get little personal messages (and money!), and even better to get home-made cards. Such cool statements.

But I can’t think of a statement quite like a whole website, right? Perhaps you can think of someone special in your life you’d like to surprise with a website (seemingly) built just to make them feel special?

Just replace “say.no.to.crack.reader” with your first name and last name, or with your friend’s first and last name (for instance, “joe.shmoe”, or “jane.lynn.doe” there’s no limit to the number of names) in the following web addresses, and voila! An instant message of friendship…or enemyship…or pwnedship. Turn up your speakers and prepare to be…something.

You Are My Friend!

You Are Mighty!

You Are Lame! (I don’t actually think you’re lame)

They Will Be Defeated! (this one is written to you, about your enemy)

You Just Got 0WNED!!1

Do You Have Epilepsy Maybe? [warning: do not view if you actually do have epilepsy!]

I know they’re just silly, but I bet they’d brighten up somebody’s day. A fun way of letting a person know you’re thinking about them.

Check out Aninote.com for a few more…including one Ultra-personalized lovey-dovey one.

(thanks, Amy Winfrey, for the birthday lyrics)