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Archive for the 'Cartoon' Category

Sometimes we all make major life decisions far too difficult … but as this flow chart shows, they don’t need to be:

The Only Flowchart You'll Ever Need

Picture via The Fishbowl, original drawing by Better than your Boyfriend

Looks like I’m going to build that pool in my basement after all 😉

BifSniff is a collaborative blog started by two Irishmen – “Brendan O’Connell (Bif) and Frank Prendergast (who, despite all the questions, is not ‘Sniff’)”. Over the past few years, they have drawn hundreds of fantastic cartoons, often leveraging funny interpretations of common English phrases and a simple one cell format to create a fun and refreshing weekly read.

Three of my favorites are included below, but I’d definitely suggest checking out the cartoons section of their site to see for yourself … I was laughing the whole way through.

A Deadly Game:

A deadly game
link

Spyware:

Spyware
link

Thoughtful:

Thinking outside the box
link

I particularly liked that last one. I always snicker whenever someone proclaims “let’s think outside the box” during a meeting. To me, this statement should mean “Fun time! Let’s go get something to drink, take a walk, swim a few laps, or ride Shetland ponies at the carnival to get some fresh ideas away from the office.” Instead, this is really just another way of saying “Hey gang, let’s pull out the markers and start drawing some pretty pictures and … oh yeah, I call ‘not it’, haha!”

Next time my son wants to dump all his toys on the floor and sit in his toy box, I think I’ll just reply “No honey, why don’t we think outside the box tonight?”

Mark Stivers is a really funny cartoonist who primarily publishes online, but also has a book available through his website. Here are a few of his cartoons that I particularly liked, but I recommend visiting his site and checking out his many other funny cartoons as well:

Pavlov’s Dog:
Stivers - Pavlov's Dog

Construction Worker:
Stivers - Construction Worker

Hardware Store:
Stivers - Hardware Store

I think I was the last person in the world to get a cell phone, and now I’m closing in on being the last to buy an mp3 player. Maybe if I pull Mark’s loose wires trick, nobody will notice. 😉

Clangnuts is a cartoonist you may not have visited before, but he is definitely worth checking out. What really struck me is how he alternates between complete randomness and immediately relevant cartoons that mirror daily life. For example, consider the following cartoon …

murder on the dance floor

You are probably wondering (and understandably so), “What establishments do you frequent in order for THAT cartoon to be relevant?”. OK, so I’ll concede that for most of you this probably falls in the ‘Completely Random’ category, but it immediately swept me back to an experience I had back in the late 90’s … it’s actually a pretty funny story:

For about a year, I worked in Beloit, Wisconsin as a consultant. Most people view Wisconsin as being full of cheery folks who have massively expanded waistlines from eating too many fried cheese curds (which I found to be amazingly delicious) and Oscar Mayer wieners. While this appeared to be true everywhere else in The Great Cheese State, Beloit was a different animal (although we did hang out with the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile crew one night – you haven’t lived until you see the sun rise over a 12 foot high fiberglass hot dog from your motel room window ;)).

One Wednesday night we went to a highly recommended local restaurant. To my dismay, it was Karaoke night, and the establishment described to us as “The best after work restaurant and bar in Beloit” looked like the perfect setting for a bad Patrick Swayze movie.

We knew something wasn’t quite right when this creepy guy with a greased back mullet and missing upper canine tooth strolled up to us and said “Hey there … see that big red Ford F150 out by the street? It cost me $8,000, but I won’t have any problems covering the payments … see, it cost me exactly what I’ve won from these Karaoke contests … $100 each week for 8 weeks in a row since this place has reopened again … oh yeah.”

We all started snickering, and he made a strange/annoyed face and walked away, completely oblivious. Apparently they don’t teach math in Beloit, as the 6 or 7 others in his posse looked at us as if we were from the moon when we laughed.

Despite the fact that we were constantly being approached by similarly creepy locals with other odd stories and suggestions, what got us worried was that he said “since this place has reopened again”. So we asked around, and finally found someone who told us: “Every few months this place shuts down because of either a stabbing or a shooting, but don’t worry … it’s usually just a stabbing … and usually just because of some stupid argument over who won the Karaoke contest.”

We initially didn’t believe him until a cop strode in later and wearily retold the exact same story … then said “it’s actually really safe, I bring my family here sometimes … just don’t pick any fights.” Great. Not only do I HATE Karaoke at bars, but now the cop verified that we could get killed over it. Coincidentally, as the cop was finishing, two of the rowdy Chicago guys in our group went up to sing Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “I like Big Butts”, which apparently does not go over so well in a country loving Wisconsin bar.

A few jeers and angry looks from the locals was all it took for us to pay our bill and race back to the Holiday Inn Express. We didn’t even cheer our friends as they finished – particularly since the winner each week was determined by the enthusiasm of the crowd … we weren’t about to let our friends be the reason the restaurant shut down the next time.

I hadn’t thought of that story in years until I saw the above cartoon. Thanks Clangnuts for the memories, and for letting me use your cartoons! BTW – here’s another two of his cartoons that I thought were pretty funny:

Loretta:
loretta tattoo

Nuclear War:
thermos nuclear war

Have a great day everyone, I hope you enjoyed this post (I know I did)!

Cartoon of the Week: Dog eat Doug

If you have a dog, you know that they can do some of the funniest things. As a kid, my family had a huge Old English Sheepdog. She was easily the dumbest dog I ever saw … she would eat anything from lobster tails to ping pong balls to crayons (which my brother and I thought was a hoot the next day when playing in the backyard). But she was also the most fun dogs ever. Both kids and adults seem to always feel the same way as I did – they LOVE their dogs.

My love for dogs instantly drew me to the comic strip Dog eat Doug, by Brian Anderson. Brian obviously goes nuts over his dog Sophie (the main Dog in the comic), resulting in a great comic that mixes humor, cuteness, and deep insights into the inner workings of the dog’s brain (OK, I made that last part up).

Here’s a couple of Brian’s Dog eat Doug comics that I liked (cheesy title’s are mine) … thanks again Brian for letting us post these!

Tough kitty (click for full size) – totally cute
dog eat doug cute

Dog power (click for full size)
dog eat doug funny

You can view the entire archive of Dog eat Doug comics here or view Brian’s Dog eat Doug main page and blog at www.dogeatdoug.com.

Have your own funny dog stories? Share them, we love to read about silly dogs!

Do you use MySpace, Friendster, Yahoo 360, or other social networking sites? If so, have you been able to make real friends on them? I had never tried, so with the urging of a few friends I signed up for MySpace as an experiment, simply using Anita as my screen name.

I was anxious to see how many ‘friends’ I could make. To get rolling quickly, I updated the default profile with my name, location, and literally the first picture in this computer’s ‘My Documents’ folder:
kid in toilet
(OK, so maybe you can already guess the outcome of my little experiment based on my choice of pictures, but since I didn’t know a thing about these sites I wasn’t about to use my real picture yet)

Initially, I decided it would be best to act particularly friendly by accepting any and all friend requests. Within hours, I received my first friend invitation. Wow, that was quick! After accepting, I also received my first comment ‘Hey, why don’t you post some real pictures … I bet you’re hot’.

Apparently guaging each other’s “hotness” is a major purpose of the site, or at least the outcome when you use a picture of a toilet in your profile. Within 2 weeks, I had a colorful array of over 90 friends with names such as Boob, BooB (who didn’t appear related to the first friend), I love Superman, and Toilet. I also became friends with a bunch of bands I had never heard of, some of which had over 10,000 friends … pretty popular bands I guess!

After my circle of friends grew to such proportions, I thought I might as well be social and chat with them. When I left messages for the ladies, they didn’t really say much back. I guess Boob and I weren’t such good friends after all! When I said hi to the guys, they were far more friendly … but more in the “Hey, send me some dirty pictures and then let’s meet” sense than the “what’s happening, tell me a little about yourself” type of introduction that I was expecting.

My experiment ended almost as soon as it started. After a couple weeks, I decided to start introducing myself to other people. Over a couple days, I invited about 50 over-18 folks to be my friend – all of whom appeared to be a little more reserved than my original bunch. 20 or 30 accepted too, but the next day I receive a message from MySpace saying that my account has been deleted because I was spamming their users.

Good thing too … I would have been the MySpace equivalent to playing Parcheesi with your grandparents – who needs such boredom when our kids have fun friends like Boob, BooB, and Toilet to chat with.

friendster patent
(thanks to Chris Pirillo and Brad Fitzpatrick for the comic … BTW – Friendster actually DID recently patent the process of making friends online, look out MySpace!)

Cartoons about animals are funny … cartoons about cows are even funnier. I have no idea why, but cartoon cows always make me laugh. Speaking of which, I recently stumbled upon a really funny cartoonist who goes by the name of Stik. Here are two of his cartoons that a couple of us here really enjoyed:

Hitching cow:
Grass is greener.

Luke Cowwalker faces his destiny – for fans of George Lucow’s first star wars trilogy (OK – I made up the names, if you don’t like them, don’t knock Stik):
Star Wars cow.

Another contributor here at Say No to Crack initially liked the first cartoon better, but stated that “The star wars one gets funnier every time I look at it.” See for yourself … glance somewhere else for a few seconds and then look at the cartoon again … much funnier the second time. I’ve looked at it so many times that I now think it’s one of my favorite cartoons ever (although I’m a huge Empire Strikes Back fan, so I may be biased).

For more funny cow (and other) cartoons, check out Stik’s blog.

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