I know it’s been a while since I posted last, but in the last month I’ve graduated, moved, got my old temporary summer job back, started sending out resumes, and became a SUPER HERO TO DUCKS WORLDWIDE.
Let me tell you a tale, my friends. A tale of selfless heroism, cuteness beyond reason, and the threat of impending doom to my face.
As I’m sure you’re aware, summer is in full swing here in the Northern Hemisphere. This means, among other things, ducklings are beginning to pepper the land; wherever there are bodies of water, fluffy little bodies scamper.
The event in question occurred a few days after my graduation. I’d returned to campus with my friend K to help out at the school’s television station for the afternoon. At lunch break, we headed out of the building along the west side. Up against the side of the building, I noticed a lady mallard sitting with three fuzzy little babies at her side. I quickly drew K’s attention to the sight, but noticed something amiss.
The sound of baby ducks peeping filled the air, but not one of the three ducklings in view was making a sound. Where were the little cries coming from? From about seven other little duckies who were lost. They were blocked from the mother by a wall, thusly:
As you may be able to decipher, the rest of the duck family was trapped in on a ledge where the mother had built her nest under a small decorative tree. It was a very clever place for a nest, but now the ducks could not find their mother on the other side of the four foot divider between the tree and the steps where she waited.
K and I sprang into action!
I immediately hopped the concrete divider into the mulched area where the ducklings were. They began scampering around frantically at the sight of me, and I was nearly overcome by the sheer cuteness of the sight.
I began scooping up the ducklings, one by one, and passing them over the wall to K, who stood beside mother duck and lowered them each down. The air was filled with the peeps of panicked ducklings, waddling around at top speed to avoid my grasp. Little did they know I was helping them; but I was not annoyed. How could you be upset with this:
As much as K and I would have liked to pause a moment and cuddle the little rascals, there was no time. The Mama duck was getting nervous at our presence, and was slowly starting to edge away. We couldn’t let her go before all the ducklings were safely delivered to her side of the barrier!
Soon, with the power of TEAMWORK, we had every last baby mallard on the correct side of the divide. But mother had already decided to run away at top speed. In her haste she left behind a duckling, who in its frenzied panic, was running uselessly around in circles until she was out of sight around the corner.
Now began the duck chase.
I quickly snatched up the confused duckling and ran after the mother duck, calling after her to wait. Only in retrospect to I realize how incredibly stupid that sounds, as I sincerely doubt that duck could understand English. All the people on campus, however, could, and I can only imagine how retarded I looked chasing a duck across campus…with another duck.
When I caught up to the mother duck, she wheeled around defensively, and I saw my life flash before my eyes. She opened her beak in a threat and spread her wings. I knew I had but a brief moment to save my face from utter destruction, for in a moment I knew she would lunge for my delicate nose.
I quickly tossed the fluffy baby onto the grass at her feet. Appeased, the mother duck lowered her wings and turned to go, ten yellow striped ducklings following her in a row.
I now almost wish I’d followed her to see where she was going – the nearest lake was in the opposite direction. But I’m sure she had it under control.
Now I don’t claim that this event has made me some kind of hero, or duck savior…but I’m pretty sure history will show that I totally was.