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Funny Auctions

I’m not exactly an Ebay expert under any circumstances, but I have been known to throw in a bid at the occasional item of interest. So I guess I’ve got just enough experience to wonder why, oh why on earth, would anyone believe that selling some of these items would be a profitable idea? And who is buying these things? (In some cases, nobody).

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1. Potato Stewie.
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“THIS AUCTION IS FOR A FAMILY GUY STEWIE HEAD CHIP COUPON. YOU CAN SEE IN PICTURE TWO EYES AND NOSE. SAME SHAPE AS STEWIE’S HEAD. (WHICH BY THE WAY IS NOT EDIBLE)”

2. Also inedible, Vintage Gum
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“You are bidding on an unopened package of sugarless grape flavored Bubble Yum bubble gum. The gum is rock hard and is not meant for consumption.”

This one assumes the gum is from the ’80s because of the phrase “keeps it poppin'” It is sad how little people remember what the ’90s were capable of. For something TRULY from the ’80s, you can’t compete with currency…

3. $.05! Now for only $1.50 (plus shipping)!
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VERY POWERFUL ITEM!! AMAZING!!

EVA’S 1988 NICKEL!!

SHE ALWAYS USED TO CARRY IT WITH HER.

THE POWERFUL SPELLS ON IT ARE FOR TRIPLE MONEY SPELL AND DREAMS COME TRUE SPELL.

OWNED AND CARRIED BY EVA, MY GRANDMA, A REAL EUROPEAN GYPSY.

4. Or, better still, $1 for only $14!!

ONE PERSON I KNOW CARRIED THIS DOLLAR IN THEIR WALLET. THEY WERE UNEMPLOYED AND 2 YEARS LATER WERE MAKING OVER $250,000 PER YEAR. IT WASN’T FROM A LOTTERY OR WINDFALL FROM THE SKY (face it those type of things dont happen very often), BUT IT WAS FROM BEING SHOWN A BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY OUT OF THE BLUE THAT WITH HARD WORK SKYROCKETED. Now, you could say It wasnt from the lucky dollar, but by fate, or chance, but does it hurt to carry a little luck with you.

Somewhere, someone is buying these. I just know it. :(

But hey. “Lucky Money” is easy to imitate. But you can’t fake the luck of a

5. lucky hairband.

This is my lucky hair band. I have had this hair band for the last 5 years and they have been the luckiest 5 years of my life.

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Hey! You should buy that and then you’d have good luck bidding in auctions online! It’s foolproof!

And it wouldn’t be a Karen post without a video, I guess.

Happy bidding (and happy Memorial Day, American readers).

5 Responses to “Funny Auctions”

  1. on 27 May 2008 at 12:51 pm Mr. Fabulous

    Must bid on ALL…

  2. on 28 May 2008 at 11:20 pm Pete Aldin

    It’s funny that these are ON ebay. What’s funnier is people bid on them.

  3. on 28 May 2008 at 11:20 pm Pete Aldin

    Oh. Sorry, Mr Fabulous.

  4. on 29 May 2008 at 8:07 pm Karen

    Hah, good catch everybody. I’ll go ahead and blame working from 6 am to 4:30 every day this week for that one, but whoops regardless.

  5. on 30 May 2008 at 10:05 pm Val Parker

    that lucky rubber band is all mine! My hair has not been having good days and this is the golden chalice I’ve been waiting for.

    Your website is a plethora of entertainment!

    FirstClasstoHell.com

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