I write this post in the sincere hope that I am not the only one here in love with the old 1960’s Adam West Batman series/movie. For today, I have found myself giggling like an idiot at this beautiful collection of Batman-lecturing-Robin quotes; it’s great enough that I forgive it for being on an old tripod website (jeez, talk about ‘remember when…’).
Holy Painted Eyebrows, Batman!
Some highlights:
Robin: “Gosh, Batman, this camel grass juice is great.”
Batman: “Beware of strong stimulants, Robin.”
Robin: “To the batcave?”
Batman: “And up the batpoles.”
Robin: “The batpoles?”
Batman: “Even crimefighters need their sleep, Robin.”
Batman: “Human mechanisms are made by human hands, Robin. None of them is infallible. It is a lesson that must be faced.” Too true, too true.
Robin: “Self-control is sure tough sometimes, Batman!”
Batman: “All virtues are, old chum. Indeed, that’s why they’re virtues.”
Batman: “Robin, the Constitution provides that a man is innocent until proven guilty. And the Constitution is the cornerstone of our great nation. We must abide by it.”
Robin: “Gosh, when you put it that way…”
You know, Bush won’t be president for too much longer.
(pause for various reactions from different corners)
…So I thought I’d put this one up before it’s too late. I’ve been sitting on it for a while, but I really must share. Plus, me being the sucker for parody (and zombies) I am, I just don’t feel right withholding this brilliant piece of work from you all.
He ended up getting suspended for it, but I think it’s a good idea. In the end, it’s only for the kids’ own good. In fact, the idea ought to be expanded to help more…uh…(shouldn’t say stupid)…educationally challenged people. Even adults.
Alright, there ma’am, you want this particular blender? Now, it’s got sharp parts, can I just see your report card for Handling Pointy Spinny Things? Ah, a D? Too bad.
Okay, sir, you want to buy this engagement ring? Can I just see your Relationship IQ? Ah, that low? Sorry, stupid; get smart, then get married.
Well, before I give you this motor scooter…oh, heck, just go away, man.
Ladies, have you ever been invited to a party and not known what to wear? Or gone to work but not wanted to take extra clothes and shoes for after work activities? Well, now you don’t need to worry, these shoes will ensure you’re always prepared:
High Tide Heels obviously represent the future of fun and fashion. I’m told this picture was taken in Belgium, but I think these shoes will certainly make a huge global splash in coming months.
I’ve shown Doug Savage’s great Savage Chickens comic here before, but Doug has outdone himself this time. He decided to enter a music video contest for Laura Veirs, even though he only had 12 days until the deadline and no prior animation experience.
After 500 chicken drawings (equal to his entire comic output over the past two years!), a sore arm, callused finger, and an injured back from leaning over the tripod so much, Doug submitted this great stop-motion animation:
Imagine you are at the doctor’s office and receive some unpleasant news – the doctor wants you to come in for a colonoscopy. She sees your disappointment and decides to cheer you up a bit by showing you some educational material on the procedure’s preparation:
That’s right, a giant pink plastic polyp. Complete with sticky squishy eyes (in this case, a fly has stuck to one of them, yummy). This is actually a REAL marketing product developed for Fleet’s Phospho-Soda (a fast acting laxative), in tandem with their print campaign:
Considering the polyp’s choices of hiding spots, I’m hoping that they don’t create a TV commercial of it playing peek-a-boo.
I have the honor to offer this breaking news flash. President George W. Bush has just announced that Nelson Mandela, former South African President and Human Rights Activist, has been assassinated by Saddam Hussein:
Normally this would be rather somber news, except for the minor issue that Nelson Mandela was alive as of two days ago (September 18th, 2007), yet Saddam Hussein was executed last year (December 30, 2006). This can only mean one of three things:
The Hussein execution, like the Moon landing and Tupac Shakur’s death, were staged by the U.S. government as a means to increase American spending on cable TV services.
Saddam is dead, but the remaining members of the “Axis of Evil” have either created an ultra-evil Saddam replica robot or revived him as a Zombie hungry for internationally renowned diplomats’ blood … or both.
Bush’s advisers have him believing that we’re in Iraq because Saddam killed a third of all Nobel Laureates while plotting to blow up the moon to obtain its delectable Swiss cheese core.
Okay, so. The story basically is: a kid absent-mindedly draws a clumsy sketch that, when examined, resembles a gun. The kid is then, naturally, suspended because this drawing, beyond shadow of doubt, represents a threat
I’m not going to go into the politics of this one. I just think it’s completely hilarious that the kid got suspended for this:
People. Were afraid. Of that.
I had no idea intimidating other was so easy! Of course! I don’t need weapons! Paper and pencil will be my weapons! And I will rule the world! Watch out people…
I have a bow and arrow!
I have a sword!
Look out…it’s a wild cougar!!
Now watch as I rule the world with my….Killer ROBOT!
And now I am just as dangerous as any doodling 13-year old! Muahahahaha!! Behold and tremble at my mad MS PAINT SKILLS!
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