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Archive for February, 2007

UPDATE: The contest is over, but I’m waiting for you to help me pick the winner in this short poll. Thanks for all your great jokes, I had a fun time reading them!

Why did the chicken cross the roadTime for another fun little contest. This one’s easy – just add a comment with your best short joke.

Leave as many jokes as you’d like, they can be original or ones you’ve heard elsewhere. The only limitations are to keep them short and keep them G/PG rated.

Depending on the response, I’ll either announce my favorites here or put them up for vote. The top 5 will get posted here with a link back to their site (if they have one). I’ve decided to throw in a fun mystery prize for the best one (or a cash prize if the winner would prefer)!

Even cheesy or bad jokes are welcome … I laugh at almost anything, even this:

Worst chicken cross the road joke ever

The contest will end Saturday night, so don’t delay in showing off your inner Comedian! 😉

Refreshing

Dehydrated Water
(thanks David Reeves)

This was spotted on the chemical storage shelf in a laboratory adjacent to David’s. What could be more refreshing than a dehydrated can-o-water?

Our Crack team of photographers was able to capture this picture, a split second before Chewbacca headbutted a tour guide dressed as a pirate outside Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in L.A.:

Chewbacca attacks

‘Chewie’ was reported as saying “Nobody tells this Wookiee what to do,” right before slamming his head into the guide’s forehead. While Superman was present, he didn’t step in to end the scuffle, probably because Elmo and Mr. Incredible had lost their priveleges in similar fights earlier (so far, all 100% real … via Reuters).

Chewie’s arrest marked the end of a long downward spiral from his famed role in Star Wars. Chewbacca’s first attempt at salvaging his career wasn’t so bad … his height and strength made him an unbeatable pitcher for the Boston Red Sox:
Chewbacca Pitches for Red Sox
(thanks Loren)

Chewbacca’s baseball career ended abruptly when he started eating baseballs and shooting at costumed stormtroopers with his laser. Given his celebrity status, the police felt that prison would be too dangerous for the wookie, so placed him in a zoo instead.

All was well until Chewie mistook a young kangaroo for a cute female Wookie:
Kangaroo after wookie attack
(picture by Dan via Little Lamb)

The police couldn’t excuse him for breaking the poor kangaroo’s leg (even if accidentally), so Chewbacca went underground:
Chewbacca in Disguise
(thanks Karin)

Celebrities … they can never stay out of the limelight for long, even if it means ditching a disguise to do a little headbutting. 😉

I think I saw a dog trying this in the Walmart parking lot the other day:

(if you can’t see the video, click here)

I’ve just learned of an epidemic that has been quietly spreading across the globe, plaguing our cities, and placing our children in peril. Yes, you guessed correctly … bicycles being ridden without front tires.

The problem has gotten so bad that signs have been posted to warn unsuspecting riders. Here’s one in Portland, Oregon:

Bicycle Warning
(thanks Patrick!)

After countless accidents, parents are mounting a class action lawsuit against bicycle manufacturers. One plaintiff exclaimed:

There wasn’t no warnings or nothing, we thought it just a spare. Billy was so excited to ride his new bike, but then he fell in a bush and all the kids laughed and called us names. How were we supposed to know it needed two tires to work right?

We called Wal-mart, and the lady just said “that’s why it’s called a BI-cycle and not a UNI-cycle”. So what does that mean? Do I now need to know greek or something to know which bike to buy for my kid?

Recognizing that a massive lawsuit could be brewing, bicycle manufacturers have quickly responded by placing the following warning on all bikes:
Warning - do not operate a bicycle with one wheel

Favorite MTV video?

When MTV first arrived in my backwoods Pennsylvania hometown, I thought it was the greatest invention ever. To me, this meant the end of bad radio, no more Carpenters on reel-to-reel tapes, and a welcome distraction to block the noise from some of my mother’s piano students.

The first song I saw on MTV was a-ha’s “Take on Me”. This is the catchy video mixing black and white animation with live actors. If you still don’t remember, here’s a screenshot (I’d post the video, but it looks like YouTube will be required to take down all MTV videos very soon):

Take on me screen capture

Still don’t remember? Check out Family Guy’s funny (and quick) rehash of the song:

(if you can’t see the video, click here)

Had I seen something else (for example, anything other than the greatest music video ever produced), maybe MTV wouldn’t have seemed nearly as cool. Not that MTV’s coolness factor lasted very long.

Do you remember the first thing you saw on MTV? Or your favorite video before MTV became Real World TV?

If they ever make a video dictionary, this woman should be listed as the first entry under obsession:

(if you can’t see the video, click here)

via

Pass the Savage Chickens Please!

After weeks of research, we have finally concluded our quest for the funniest cartoon drawn entirely on Post-It notes. The clear leader in this category (by a beak) is the hilarious Savage Chickens by Doug Savage.

Doug loved to draw cartoons as a kid, but stopped drawing entirely after entering the corporate world. Like all of us, he tried to convince himself and friends that he was fulfilled:

Savage Chickens hate work too
link

Then one day the chickens came to the rescue, and reignited a creative flame in Doug. Thankfully, he began jotting down all his ideas on Post-It notes, and has scanned over 500 cartoons so far. Sometimes fun-loving, sometimes quirky, and sometimes savage, the chickens kept me entertained through two years worth of drawings:

Chicken hypochondriac
link

Like the cartoons so far? Then go give the Savage Chickens a hug … but don’t squeeze too hard, you never know who they hugged last:

Savage Chicken hugs cactus
link

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