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Merry Christmas everyone! Hopefully you’re getting a chance to enjoy your day off, spend time with your family, and keep away from these intertubes … unless of course you don’t like your family, in which case I hope you enjoy these silly Christmas jokes. If you have little kids, they may like some of these as well!

1st Guy: What do you think of this diamond ring I bought my wife?
2nd Guy: WOW! That rock is huge, but I thought she wanted that snazzy little red SUV?
1st Guy: She did, but where am I going to find a fake Jeep?

What do you call a man who claps at Christmas?
Santapplause!

Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden?
Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe!

Son to his mother: can I have a dog for Christmas?
Mom: No you can have turkey like everyone else!

Who is never hungry at Christmas?
The turkey – he’s always stuffed!

What do you call a huge polar bear?
Nothing, you just run away as fast as you can

Whats the best thing to put in a Christmas cake?
Your teeth!

Whats happens if you eat the Christmas decorations?
You get tinsel-itus!

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit

6 Responses to “Silly Santa and Christmas Jokes”

  1. on 25 Dec 2006 at 2:12 pm Diesel

    Thanks, because I didn’t get enough of my 7 year old reciting bad Christmas jokes.

    Merry Christmas, Anita!

  2. on 25 Dec 2006 at 8:19 pm Nessa

    Merry Christmas, Anita. I don’t have a seven year old tell me silly jokes, so thanks.

    Great, good wishes for the coming New Year.

  3. on 25 Dec 2006 at 9:07 pm udit

    merry christmas! may this day bring you lots n lots of joy and happiness!

  4. on 26 Dec 2006 at 6:42 am libragirl

    Thanks for the jokes that I can now tell my 5 & 7 y/o nephews to make them laugh. I’ll be the greatest aunt ever until my sister shows up with the niece, then I’m forgotten

  5. on 26 Dec 2006 at 2:21 pm Vincent

    Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
    You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit

    I like this the most, calling Santa “the fat guy”. Hahaha

  6. on 01 Jan 2007 at 6:45 pm KARYN

    What goes, “ho, ho, ho,” plop.?

    Santa laughing his head off.

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